I know there’s a lot of discussion about this calendar year shift, and it’s been interesting to watch the conversation while navigating my own life over the past week or two. I find myself actually yearning for more solo time to reflect but also trying to enjoy as much time as possible with a tiny human during their winter school break.
I’ve learned that I don’t resonate with detailed and lengthy long-range goals (especially this time of year) and my navigation through early winter is like a patchwork quilt of things that work for me… reflection, celebration, divination, burning shit, and looking forward but only in ways that make me feel grounded right now.
Online, I see a lot of really superficial attachment and predictable narratives around the change of year/decade that are riddled with unhealthy expectations, are insistent on magically becoming someone that we’re not, and are just generally impractical, unrealistic, or even toxic.
On the other hand, I see a lot of predictable backlash against those things and some of that is just as predictable and toxic. A lot of people seem to be deep diving into things that will set up a year of definitely not meeting their unrealistic goals, or meeting goals that are so rigid that they don’t honor the unexpected, or wandering through the year with a resentful defiance of all things reflective or planful.
The reality for me is that the reflective honoring of cultural and seasonal shifts is sacred and it’s not tied into one day, but the day our culture has chosen can provide a vague guideline for one of these touchstones in our lives.
January 1st is pretty meaningless to me as a day, yes, but is it useful for us to create or use existing systems for checking in with ourselves? Hell yes. In the same way that I benefit from a weekly peek at my schedule and task list, and a monthly review of bills, income, longer range projects, and how the hell I’m doing… looking back at a year is useful. Looking back at a decade is useful.
Does our reflection have to be at those intervals, or the same intervals every time? Nope. Do we have to do it the same way or with the same degree of detail and investment at every interval? NOPE. Life shifts and our needs for reflection and forward vision shift as well. Sometimes I do very little at the new calendar year but do a deep dive into everything in February or July.
I guess I mostly just want to take a moment and offer permission for this time of year to be whatever you need. If you want to reflect but you don’t want to set intentions or look forward right now, awesome. If you’re forward thinking and structured and intentional with goals during this time and that works for you, sweet. If you want to really dig into this shift in ways that are personalized and witnessed, that’s part of what this community space is for, and it’s part of what I spend January doing. I’d love to have that conversation with you, see what you’re doing and share what I’m doing.
But whatever you do with these few days, this season (even if it’s nothing)… let it be because it’s rooted in YOU, in what you need from this moment in time, in who you are, in how you best work within your life path, in where you’ve been and where you want to be. Don’t let it be rooted in any other bullshit.
Happy New Year. Happy Winter. Happy Whateverthefucktodayis.
If you’re looking for community in 2020, keep this space in mind if you’re not already a patron. If you’re looking for a tool for the new year and reflection, check out my post on that over here. If you want a peek at my planning and reflecting, there’s a quick clip over here.